A guide to learning how to communicate with people who have diametrically opposed opinions from you, how to empathize with them, and how to (possibly) change their minds
America is more polarized than ever. Whether the issue is Donald Trump, healthcare, abortion, gun control, breastfeeding, or even DC vs Marvel, it feels like you can’t voice an opinion without ruffling someone’s feathers. In today’s digital age, it’s easier than ever to build walls around yourself. You fill up your Twitter feed with voices that are angry about the same issues and believe as you believe. Before long, you’re isolated in your own personalized echo chamber. And if you ever encounter someone outside of your bubble, you don’t understand how the arguments that resonate so well with your peers can’t get through to anyone else. In a time when every conversation quickly becomes a battlefield, it’s up to us to learn how to talk to each other again.
In Talking Across the Divide, social justice activist Justin Lee explains how to break through the five key barriers that make people resist differing opinions. With a combination of psychological research, pop-culture references, and anecdotes from Justin’s many years of experience mediating contentious conversations, this book will help you understand people on the other side of the argument and give you the tools you need to change their minds–even if they’ve fallen for “fake news.”
-
Sexual Content - 0/5
0/5
-
Violence - 0/5
0/5
-
Language - 0/5
0/5
-
Drugs and Alcohol - 0/5
0/5
Summary
When my church offered a six week, in-depth discussion and study of Talking Across the Divide, I decided to join in. I thought the book sounded interesting, especially in light of how polarized our society is right now. I think the only way we’re going to solve this problem is if we’re willing to listen to the other side and try to find common ground. But where does one start with this endeavor? Just thinking about it is daunting to me, and probably would be to most other people as well. I’m guessing that most fall into one of two groups: avoiders like me, who simply try to dodge talking about divisive topics, or arguers, who only add fuel to the fire by attacking and yelling at one another while not getting anywhere or changing anyone’s mind. I figured there had to be a better way, but I had no idea what it might be until picking up this book.
Author Justin Lee teaches readers all the necessary steps for engaging in a successful strategic dialogue. He shows step-by-step exactly how to talk with someone with whom we disagree and perhaps even persuade them to your way of thinking. He also explains in detail the five main barriers to effective communication, along with strategies that can be used to overcome them. There’s admittedly a lot of work that needs to go into having this type of dialogue, and it may not be for everyone. It may take a certain type of personality and most definitely a willingness to set aside one’s own ego before you can even get started. Most of the members of our discussion group seemed a little skeptical, feeling as though they’ve already talked themselves blue in the face and haven’t gotten anywhere, and I started out a little skeptical as well. But as I read more and more of the book, I genuinely came to believe these methods could work when the person using them is serious about the process. That said, though, it may not be a magic cure-all for every situation, and the author admits that. Even if it does work, it may also take time and multiple sessions of strategic dialogue to get the desired results.
Overall, I found Talking Across the Divide to be an excellent book if one is willing to put in the work. Mr. Lee is just such a person, who has made going into charged environments in an effort to get two opposing sides to dialogue his life’s mission. He’s also very talented at breaking down a difficult and confusing topic into easily understandable steps that the reader can take to find common ground with those with whom we might be in conflict. I also like that while he approaches it more from the standpoint of bridging political and social gaps, these techniques might also be useful and applicable to everyday situations as well, such as marital or workplace conflicts. Bottom line, if you find yourself at odds with someone, particularly someone you care about, then give this book a try. For now, I think I’m generally content to continue my avoidance techniques, but I know this may not work forever. So, this book is still definitely a keeper that I’ll certainly refer back to if I find myself in a situation where it’s necessary to dialogue with someone in order to make peace or to get across a point that’s too important to be swept under the rug.
Review provided by The Hope Chest Reviews (http://www.thcreviews.com)